Tuning Up For Death... Or Something As Sure As...

Doing taxes is a little like tuning a guitar. You pull everything up so that it's more or less in tune, stretch a little bit, bring it all up again. Pick a string. Tweak at it until it's there, stretch it again, bring it back up. Use that string to reference the next one and repeat the steps you followed for the first one, then go back and re-tune the first as it will need more tweaking due to the tweaking and stretching on your second. You then repeat this for the following strings, going back and tweaking the previous until everything is no longer stretchy and is right on the money. Then you have to put the thing on your knee and wallop it a whole bunch of times, shake it, rock it, sing loudly to it and do one more final tuning and then sit back and admire your job. Although, sometimes all that infernal tweaking leads to eternal tweaking and you can never get the damn thing to work... sometimes after this you have no choice but to forget the tweaking and just start paying... Ooops, I mean playing - Slip of the tongue!